TOP TIPS FOR CHANGEMAKERS #12
THE MINDSET EDITION
At Actually we believe that there are three things that you need to grow your business and your impact as a purpose-led entrepreneur: the right communications, the right mindset and the right support.
In this blog, we explore the five most common mindset challenges you need to overcome if you’re going to get ‘on purpose’ and make your difference in the world.
CHANGE IS THE NATURAL ORDER OF THINGS
In my opinion, the single biggest difference between the people who grow their business, grow their impact and make a real difference in the world and those who don’t, is belief.
The ones growing world-changing businesses BELIEVE that they can.
They believe that they can create a successful business. They believe that change is possible. And they believe that they – and their business – can create that change.
They don’t listen to the naysayers. They don’t listen to the voice inside their mind saying ‘You can’t do it…go back to bed.’ They don’t listen to the critics, the doom-mongers or the pessimists.
How do you develop this unshakeable belief? First, get logical. Not believing in the possibility of change is like not believing in the air you breathe. Change is not only possible, it is the natural order of things. Second, you get really clear about the change you want to create – your big ‘WHY’ – because it will inspire you when the going gets hard and you experience setbacks. Third, you learn how to handle that inner voice that has you doubting yourself: your inner critic.
MONEY IS GOOD
Yes it is. To quote one of my business mentors, Fabienne Frederickson, ‘There’s nothing holy about poverty.’
The world is full of abundance. In the same way that change is the natural order of things, so too is abundance. If you choose to believe that there is not enough; if you choose to believe in lack and scarcity and a ‘zero sum game’ in which I win and you lose: you will repel abundance. So, if money doesn’t come easily to you or if it slips through your fingers when you get it: you need to look at your beliefs.
It’s easy to create false beliefs about money based on your experience. I grew up on the island of Jersey – renowned as a ‘tax haven’ (I have views about that moniker but that’s a whole other blog post!). I had a lot of wealthy friends. I went to a private school. But we weren’t wealthy. And so I grew up believing in the possibility of wealth but that a) it wasn’t for me and b) that the only way for the ‘likes of me’ to have money was to work incredibly hard for it.
It took me a long time to challenge those beliefs. I’m still working on the latter one! Step one is awareness. Spend some time considering your beliefs about money and recognise that they are JUST BELIEFS. They are NOT the truth and they do NOT determine your life, your experience or your future.
PERFECTIONISM IS JUST FEAR
I went to an event last year at which Elizabeth Gilbert was interviewed. She was promoting her new book ‘City of Girls’ but she got onto the topic of perfectionism. And she said something that I have never forgotten: ‘Perfectionism is just fear dressed up in high heels and a fur coat.’
I am a recovering perfectionist. And when I heard that, it cracked open a new perspective on my perfectionism. I asked myself: what was I so afraid of? What would happen if my work wasn’t perfect? What was it that scared me so much that I would work 18 hours a day and sometimes 7 days a week to make sure everything was ‘perfect’?
My answers to those questions will not be the same as yours – but I urge you to enquire for yourself and then tackle that fear so that you can give up on seeking perfection. Because here’s the thing: perfect is an end-point that doesn’t exist. If you’re chasing perfection, you’re chasing a shapeshifter: one that will instantly morph into something else as soon as you think you’ve grasped it. Perfectionism will burn you out – if it doesn’t drive you insane before then. Give it up.
ARE YOU AFRAID TO SUCCEED?
Most of us were raised in a cultural paradigm that encourages competition and places the greatest value on winning: ‘Nobody remembers the guy who came second.’ As a result, we all understand the fear of failure because we are taught to value success. There are hundreds of books, inspiring quotes and social media memes to help us tackle the fear of failure: so I’m not going to focus on the fear of failure here.
What I want to encourage you to consider is whether you might be holding yourself back because you’re afraid of success. Or more accurately, what you believe might be the consequences of success. Are you afraid that your friends and loved ones look at you differently? Do you fear being a ‘tall poppy’ – attacked, criticised, judged and found wanting? Are you concerned that instead of love, support and empathy, you will inspire jealousy and envy? Does it worry you that success will force you to move beyond your comfort zone?
Be honest with yourself. And then take what you find to a coach to work through because you will not succeed if you’re afraid of what it might mean.
SELF-CARE ISN’T SELFISH
I have written about self-care in a number of previous blogs. And I keep coming back to it because if you are not taking care of yourself, then you are at risk of burning out. And if you burn out – then who is going to grow your business and make your difference in the world?
At it’s core, self-care is a mindset issue and one of the most common beliefs underpinning a failure to prioritise self-care is the belief that it is selfish. I have said this many times and I will keep repeating it until you hear me: self-care isn’t selfish.
Here’s my take on it…let’s be honest, you’re not doing a great job of hiding how knackered and stressed out you are; which means the people you most care about are probably already worried about you. The last time I burnt out I discovered that my friends and family had all been expecting it for months. They’d all been really concerned and wondering what to do. And I thought, wasn’t it more selfish of me to have caused them all so much worry than it would have been to just take some time off when I needed to?
So stop being a selfish so and so. Save your family and friends from all that grief and worry. Take better care of you. Starting now. And if you’ve already understood that self-care isn’t selfish but you’re STILL not prioritising your needs, then take a look at this free Actually guide: From Burning Out to Shining Bright I hope it helps.
Are you ready to grow your business and your impact? If you’re a purpose-led entrepreneur take the ‘Are You Actually Ready?’ quiz and find out whether it’s your mindset, your communications or your support that you need to focus on to take your growth to the next level.
Let’s ACTUALLY make a difference.
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